


The Crutch That Ain't Under My Arm

by TySobo



Category: Newsies (1992), Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-03
Updated: 2018-04-17
Packaged: 2019-02-09 22:11:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 13,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12897900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TySobo/pseuds/TySobo
Summary: In which Crutchy struggles with nightmares after coming back from the refuge and struggles with certain other feelings he finds he has.





	1. Chapter 1

Crutchie was crying in his sleep and mumbling words too slurred to make out. There was darkness, but everything hurt; everything burned and there was nothing he could do. There was only one thing he could think. Jack. Jack always knows what to do. He called out into the endless abyss, "Jack!". 

A voice responded, "No one is here to save you this time. Jack hasn't come yet and never will!" 

"No." Crutchie said through his tears. He even thought he heard Jack calling out to him. He was definitely on the verge of losing it.

Jack had heard Crutchie call out to him; It had actually woken him up, but he didn't mind. Jack quickly climbed down the bunk to get to Crutchie at the bottom. He knelt down and quietly spoke to the poor boy to try to get him to wake up. "Hey, Crutchie. It's me, Jack." 

He heard Crutchie say no very pitifully and it just about broke his heart. He shook Crutchie's arm this time.

Crutchie woke up, but his nightmare was never truly over. "Hey, Crutchie, it's alright. I'm here. Jack's here."

Crutchie looked up stunned, but then started silently crying again. "Hey, hey, don't you go cryin' now. It'll be fine." Jack sat on the edge of the bed and took the smaller figure into a hug.

Crutchie moved over to make room for Jack to join him. Jack continued whispering "Shh" and other things to calm him down. Once his sobs subdued into minor hiccups every 20 or so seconds, Jack spoke up again. "Had another of those nightmares did ya?" Crutchie nodded. 

"What about?" Jack looked at Crutchie, hoping for some eye contact.

Crutchie just stared forward with an unwonted glazed over and pained look. "Same as always" He whispered quietly and then shut his eyes. 

"Are you ready ta talk about it yet?" Jack rubbed Crutchie's back. 

Crutchie paused for a second. "Can we go back out to the roof?"

"Sure" Jack stood up, still holding Crutchie's back. It was a short distance to bring the crutch for, so Jack just helped Crutchie over. 

Now this was not a common occurrence. Usually, Crutchie insisted on doing things himself, but we have already established that Crutchie was pretty shaken up and just needed someone there.

Once they got up to the roof, they lied down, quiet for a few minutes. Jack didn't want to push. Crutchie suddenly sat up and covered his eyes with the heel of his palms. 

"Crutchie?" Jack sat up with him, concerned. "Hey, you okay?"

"No. Noting's ever okay."

It completely shattered Jack's heart to see his resilient, cheery friend all out of shape and desperate like this. 

Jack side hugged Crutchie and whispered. "The hell did they do to yu in that place? ...I've heard horror stories 'bout what they does to them older kids, but those 're just rumours." Jack was more talking to himself at this point. 

Crutchie took a deep breath and wrapped his arms around his knees, looking up to the sky.

"A few times a day, one of them old guys'd come into the rooms an' pick out one of them cute boys. Happened to me a few times. No one ever talked 'bout it, ya know?"

"Gosh, what'd they do? I mean..."

"I'd bet yous thinkin right, Jack. They'd take em into another room and have 'eir way."

Jack put his hand over his mouth and a few silent tears rolled down his cheeks.

" 's why I couldn't come to meet ya. I's all beat up from when they took me in, but 'sides that it just hurt too much to walk after... after that" 

Both boys sat in silence as tears rolled freely down their cheeks. 

"Yu said a few times. How many's few?" Jack asked through his tears, afraid of the answer.

"Four." Crutchie squeaked out so quietly that Jack wasn't even sure he heard him right. 

"Oh god. 'n this is all my fault. Crutchie I'm sorry." Jack hugged Crutchie. He just wanted to take away all the pain he must be feeling. He wished all it to go away from Crutchie. His poor boy. 

"Sorry for hurtin' ya Jack. I ain't meaning to cause you no pain." Crutchie sniffled.

Jack pulled away to look at the boy he was hugging. "Crutchie listen tu me, You don't ever worry about nothin like that ever again. You telling me this can help me help you and that's what matters. M'kay?"

"Yeah, okay." Crutchie met Jack's eyes.

Jack hugged Crutchie for what felt like the twentieth time that night. He really just wanted to keep him safe and hold him. 

They stayed like that for a while. Jack noticed the small boy in his arms's breath start to slow into a steady slow motion. He could tell he was asleep or practically there. "night Crutchie. Sleep well." Jack turned his head and kissed the side of his head. 

>

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 830


	2. Chapter 2

Jack and Crutchie spelt soundly through the rest of the night. They both woke up with the bell. Jack looked over at Crutchie while the smaller boy yawned and rubbed his eyes. "Hey, you good to sell papes today? We can cover for yu."

Crutchie looked at Jack and smiled. "Yeah, I'm alright."

Jack wearily eyed Crutchie, looking for any signs of him hurting. Eventually he sighed, "What if you and I sold together today. It'd make me feel better. So whaddoya say?"

"Oh alright Jack. If it'd make you feel better." Crutchie said, still smiling.

"Yeah."

Jack stood up and fixed his clothes. He poked his head through the window to the room where the boys slept. "Alright, time to get up. Come on. Those papes don't sell 'emselves. Romeo, I see you, get up."

Jack looked back at Crutchie and laughed a little. He took Crutchie's hat from him and put it on the boy's head for him, adjusting it just right. Crutchie giggled.

Jack could easily climb through the window onto the fire escape, (as they did last night), but it was a little harder for Crutchie, especially without his crutch. He started to just go down, planning to go around to the front door. 

"Hey, Crutchie. Howsabout I go in and get your crutch for yu so you don't have to go around."

"Aw Jack, I'm fine as is." Crutchie brushed him off.

"I knows, but It'd be just helpin' out a friend. Notin related to your 'ere leg." Jack motioned to the leg that was hanging down awkwardly as he adjusted his own suspenders.

Crutchie sighed, "Oh, alright, but just this once Jack. I don't need no help." He climbed back up from the progress he'd made as Jack climbed into the window. 

Soon after, he saw his crutch poking out the window. He took it and used it to steady himself as he climbed through the window. 

They checked to make sure Romeo finally got up, and seeing as he had, went out to join the boys as they waited for the headline to be announced. They were running a little late, so they got there just as the person was climbing up to write it. A hush came over the crowd of boys.

"CANADIAN PACIFIC TO EXTEND"

The boys all groaned. This would only sell to the daily news buyers. Not a huge seller. 

Jack walked over to Mr. Weisel "Heya Weasel, I'll take 60 papes today" He set down 33 cents. 

"Not a big spender today, eh Jack?" 

"Nah, I'mma tag team with some o' my buddies today an' the headline ain't great."

Jack took his papers and waited for Crutchie to join him. "Alright Jack, you wanted to join me, so we's goin' ta my spots."

"Alright, afta you." He motioned forward. Crutchie started on his way after most of the boys had left as usual. Jack never noticed how Crutchie stayed behind and then moved so slow before.

"Not to great a headline today, huh." Crutchie looked over at Jack.

"Yeah, I seen better." 

A lady was walking by with her husband. Crutchie sped up a little to catch up with them. "Mornin' miss, mister." He dipped his head in acknowledgement. "Could I interest either of ya in a paper. Fresh off the press. Some real economics goin' down here recently. Good to stay informed." 

They gave him two pennies, took their paper, and went on their way.

Similar encounters happened on their way to the park. He'd sold most of his papers by the time they'd even got there. "Alright, here's where I usually rest up a bit. You should really get on sellin'."

Jack had never noticed how much of a natural Crutchie was. If not for his leg, he'd be the top seller for sure. 

Eventually, both boys had sold all their papers. "eh Crutchie, we's got time to kill 'for the evenin' paper, so howsabout we just hang out for a bit."

"Sure Jack." Crutchie motioned for Jack to join him on the bench. Jack put his arm around the bench around Crutchie, causing the smaller boy to blush. He looked away in hopes that Jack wouldn't notice. 

Crutchie had been feeling weird recently. He was refusing Jack's help less and less, in fact, he kind of liked it. Maybe he kind of liked Jac- "So Cruchie, how's business around here?"

Crutchie snapped out of it and looked up at Jack, causing him to blush more. "What?" oh great, now Jak really knows somethings up.

"I asked how business is 'round here." Jack stated cautiously.

"Oh, it's fine."

"Crutchie, are you sure you're fine." Yup Jack thought something was up. At least he probably didn't notice Crutchie's blushing, right? Yeah, he hasn't taken notice to it...

When Crutchie didn't respond, Jack scooted in closer. "eh, Crutchie?"

Crutchie turned his head to face Jack. Their faces were just inches apart. He felt his eyes widen and his face heat up. If Jack didn't notice now... At least Crutchie knew something was wrong with him. 

"Y-yeah. I'm f-f-fine." He said kind of squeaky and shifted uncomfortably. 

This has to just be a weird reaction he gets now from being in the refuge. Crutchie couldn't think of another explanation. He's already been tainted and broken, so it made sense to him. He just had to suppress it to not hurt Jack. 

Jack gave Crutchie a weird look. Crutchie smiled one of his signature grins, "I'm fine Jack, really. I just been a little spacey since gettin' back, ya know?"

"Yeah, I know."

Jack patted Crutchie on the back, and then the two boys got up. They then walked back to the lodging house in silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone wants more character development from someone, or if they have anything they want to happen, either comment or message me and I'll take that into consideration.
> 
>  
> 
> Word count: 956


	3. Chapter 3

A few of the guys got back from selling early, so they were sitting in a circle on the floor of their bunks room in the lodging house. They were all holding cards and very engaged in their game.

Race studied his cards. "Hmm. Specs, got any Kings?" 

"Go fish!" Specs pushed up his glasses. 

Jack leaned his head on his fist. "How 'bout Crutchie. Got any sevens?" 

"Aw Jack, I almost had all four!" Crutchie handed over three sevens as Jack laughed. 

"An' you see folks, I is down to two cards and have four matches. We may have a winner for the, what was it? Fifth time in a row..." Jack whistled and shook his head.

Specs looked kind of annoyed at this point. He kind of takes these things too seriously. He likes to be the best. "Alrighty, Romeo, got any fives?" 

"You in luck Specs, I got one." Romeo dramatically handed over his card.

Romeo shifted his cards some. "Alrighty Jack, hand over your three."

Jack looked like he wasn't expecting that for a second, but regained his composure soon after and slid the card across the floor. 

Crutchie smiled sweetly, "Hey Race, would you just so happen to have any kings?"

Race groaned, "Seriously?" He handed over two cards. Crutchy threw down all of his cards, which consisted of four kings. "Boom, now that's how you take a win!" 

Sure enough, Crutchie actually had five matches. Everyone else started counting their cards to see who got second. The way that they played, once one person was out, for each card you have in your hand, you have to take a card out from your matches. It was kind of a combination of rummy at the end. Jack actually came up with it. 

"Ha, Jack, he sure got you!" Race joked.

Jack put his hands up, "Alright, alright. Good game everybody." He then pointed at Crutchie. " 'specially you kid. You've been beatin me more an more. Now don't you go forgettin that you leart from the best."

Romeo made a face "Aw Jack. Crutchie broke your streak! Only Crutch could get away with that."

Crutchie made an innocent face and shrugged. This caused everyone to laugh and conversation picked up. Some time into their conversation, Race turned to Crutchie. "Hey Crutch why do you keep doin that, are you mad at somethin'?"

Crutchie looked to his left towards Race slightly and made a confused face. His eyes darted to Jack for some explanation for a second. "Doin what?" Crutchie asked slowly.

"Y' know, clickin' your teeth like that."

"No, like what..."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to call you out or nothin'... "

Jack suddenly whispered "Oh..." He looked towards Crutchie. "Do you think."

Crutchie's eyebrows knitted together in confusion for a second before his face relaxed with realisation. He groaned and set his face in his hands. "Yup. Oh god, I thought I outgrew them."

Romeo looked around confused. "Is it just me or is this not makin' no sense?"

Jack looked back at Crutchie, though Crutchie's head was still in his hands. "Can I-"

Crutchie kept his head in his left hand, but used his right to wave nonchalantly. "sure, sure"

"When Crutchie was younger, he had Tourettes. We thought he outgrew it."

"Oh man." Race said

Crutchie raised his head, "Now I ain't never gone round cussin or nothin, is just some movement ticks."

" 'salright kid, I'm sure it'll just go away again." Jack said, trying to comfort him. 

"Yeah... Now who's down for another round of cards!" Crutchie smiled wide. Jack smiled and started collecting all the cards off the floor.

"I'm winning this time, watch it happen!" Romeo put his hand out.

"Aw, you wish Romeo." Race added.

Crutchie chuckled. "I dunno, but my bets on Specs here. He's been awfully focused today."

Jack started shuffling "Yeah, you're all going down."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a short one. Again, If anyone has any suggestions (either plotline or for my writing), then let me know. (I can take criticism too). Thanks for sticking around!
> 
> Word count: 632


	4. Chapter 4

Race looked around at the other boys. They were all asleep. He slowly got down from his top bunk and crept out of the room. 

Crutchie woke up to the door closing. He saw that Race was gone from his bed. Cautiously, he stepped off his bed and grabbed his crutch to help him stand up. He stepped off his bed, using his crutch to help him stand up. He closed the door softly behind him and whispered loudly "Race?"

Race stopped in his tracks. Oh man, Crutchie could tell Jack and then he'd be busted for sure... "Hey Crutch, I'm just headin out fo' some fresh air. Can't sleep you know?" He said awkwardly

"Okay..." Though it was just lit by faint moonlight, Crutchie could tell by Race's face, that he was up to something. 

"Jus' go back to sleep, there's nothin goin on. I'll be back soon." Race waved his hand forward as to brush Crutchie off his case.

"Alright, but don't you go gettin' in no trouble or Jack'll have my head too," Crutchie said in a warning tone.

"You can get away with anything when it comes to Jack. You're his favourite." 

"Promise me?"

"Fine, I'll be careful." Race rolled his eyes

"Alright. Night."

"Night Crutch"

Crutchie went back into the room and lied down on his bed, causing Jack to wake up.

" 'eh Crutchie, yous alright?" Jack poked his head down from the top of the bunk, causing Crutchie to jump.

"Yeah. I's fine. Night Jack."

"Night." Jack decided not to push it.

Meanwhile, Race was making his way towards the corner of 11th street and 49th Avenue. He had a long walk and it was late at night, but he had a huge dorky smile spreading across his face. Once or twice, he almost started giggling a bit.

An hour and a half later of walking, he arrived at his destination. He made a whistle noise with his hands like those bird calls.

He stopped and listened. One called back from somewhere to his right. He smiled wide and followed the noise, calling again, and getting a response again.

He walked down an alley to the end of it, much out of the dark. He knocked on a wall 3 times and a figure popped out from behind a pile of crates. 

Race was practically beaming. "It's been too long"

They embraced and he pecked the other person on the lips. They replied. "Sure has, Racey"

"Racey? That's a new one!" He giggled 

They both moved into the light again. Race was with a shorter boy who was a little tanned and had shorter brown hair. He laughed a little. "I mean, we can get racey if ya knows what I mean."

Race laughed. "Spot, you wouldn't dare."

"You wanna find out?" He smirked.

Race laughed and wrapped his arms around Spot's neck. He leaned in for a kiss, but a bright light shined on them, causing them to jump apart. 

They heard a voice saying "I found what caused the noise complaint last week. Come here, John."

Not even a second later, they climbed up onto a trash can and hopped over the wall behind them that thankfully wasn't very high. They took off running together. 

Eventually, Race stopped, causing Spot to slow down and turn back to him. They both knelt over, trying to catch their breath. Eventually, they did and Spot started laughing. Race, in turn, joined him.

"That was wild." Spot shook his head.

"Yeah, but I came here to get some and I don't plan on leaving my boyfriend in the same situation." Race smirked.

Spot shook his head. "Now you're really asking for it"

 

When Race showed back up at the lodging house, it was around 4 in the morning. He woke Crutchie up again, for he's a really light sleeper as of late. Crutchie saw the funny way Race was walking and the dreamy look on his face and knew exactly what Race was doing. He honestly had no idea with who, but he decided not to think about it too much. He rolled over in annoyance at being woken up and tried to get at least one more hour of decent sleep before the bell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sprace chapter because every Newsies fanfic has at least one. Also because plotline is about to finally start. The book is gonna be mostly about Crutchie and Jack though don't worry if you don't ship Sprace (but honestly who doesn't?) Anywayyyys Have a good night Kids. Don't do school, stay in drugs.
> 
> word count: 708


	5. Chapter 5

"Government shut down in China! Read all about it!" Jack was shouting. It was one of those days- make something up and say whatever you must to sell the papes. 

Once he managed to sell his last paper, he took his hat off to wipe his forehead. It was a hot August day out. As soon as he set it back on his head, he heard a voice call his name.

"Jack?"

He looked in the direction of the voice to see Katherine. "Jack!"

"Hey! Katherine. What brings you here?" Jack is happy to see her, but almost wished he didn't. He had tried to suppress his uh feelings by pretending to like her, but he felt like he was using her and left.

"I'm looking for you silly!" She walked over to him.

"The star reporter looking for ol' Jack Kelly?"

"Jaaack" She whines. "I thought we had something, but then you just left. I'm not going to push you or anything, but at least allow me to invite you to my place to catch up."

Jack thought for a minute. It's not like anything would happen just by going to her house... "I'd be honored."

"Good, because I am not taking no for an answer." She smiled.

They talked the whole way to her place. Jack found out that she got a regular job with the newspaper that was not directly under her father. She was doing really well. 

 

Meanwhile, Crutchie was sitting by the door of the lodging-house anxiously.

"I'm sure he's jus' sellin his last papes, you know how Jack is." Specs was trying to comfort him.

"Yeah, don't you go worryin'. He'll show up t'morrow like normal." Race poked his head out from the supplies room.

"I guess. Thanks, guys, but I'm just gonna wait here a bit longer." Crutchie smiled wide. Race looked back at Romeo and they shook their heads but left him alone.

 

Jack was still smiling as he approached the lodging house. He opened the door, still in his own head. As soon as he saw Crutchie on the floor, his smile fell. Before he could wake him up, he sat up on his own.

"Jack!" Crutchie smiled

"What?"

"Where on earth were you?" He stood up, worried.

"Oh, I ran into Katherine, so I went to her place for tea." Jack said, smiling.

"Oh." Crutchie's smile fell, "as long as you're safe."

He turned to go up to his bed.

"Crutchie?" Jack called after him.

"It's fine Jack." Crutchie didn't even turn back.

Jack looked really upset. When he got up to the room, Crutchie wasn't in his bed.

"Where's Crutch?" He asked. No one was sleeping anyways.

Romeo poked his head out from his bottom bunk. "He went out onto the roof. He looked real sad and wasn't replying. I thinks he wants to be alone." 

Jack sighed and climbed up on his top bunk, but didn't catch a wink of sleep.

Crutchie was up on the rooftop crying. He knew Jack was going to get together with Katherine and he had no chance. He decided it best to just suppress everything he may or may not have felt for Jack. He wiped his tears and lied down, but he ended up crying silently the rest of the night.

 

The next morning, Crutchie got up early to get in front line for the paper. He needed a distraction. He bought his papers and was heading out when Jack yelled after him " Morinin Crutchie!"

He kept walking, causing Jack to sigh in defeat. What Jack didn't see was the tears silently falling down Crutchie's face as he walked away from him.

 

Similar things happened for the next two days. Jack couldn't stand it, and the rest of the boys couldn't stand seeing Jack and Crutchie. Specs called a meeting with Jack to try to figure out what he did.

"I really just don't know. He's been actin all weird since I got back late that one time." Jack said, exasperated.

"he's acting like you cheated on him or something" Race joked

Jack shot him a look, but then paled as a look of realisation washed over his face. "Ohh." He suddenly rushed to the rooftop.

"What was that all about?" Race turns to the other boys.

They all groan. "I mean, it's not like..." Race eyed the others.

"Sometimes you need to know when to shut up," Specs said from his top bunk as he threw his hand up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I had twenty reads on wattpad and then they doubled in a day! You guys are also in luck because this is the most consistent I've ever been on a story (on Wattpad, one chapter a day).
> 
> If anyone has any ideas or hopes for this story, let me know, I'm open.
> 
> Word count: 750


	6. Chapter 6

Jack climbed out onto the rooftop landing. He saw Crutchie curled up where Jack usually slept, curled up with his blanket. He'd been wondering where that went... Jack walked over to him cautiously. He went to touch his shoulder to comfort him but retracted his hand in fear of Crutchie's reaction. Instead, Jack went over to where Crutchie usually slept and lied down. Crutchie noticed him but didn't make any movement to show that besides his eyes following Jack's every move.

Suddenly Crutchie burst into tears. Jack sat up, startled. "Crutchie?"

"I'm sorry." Crutchie started shaking. "I'm sorry Jack I'm sorry"

Jack raced over to him and picked him up in a hug in his lap. "For what? Crutchie?"

"I- you should be able to be happy without me being all like this. You should be able to go an' be with Katherine, an' I sh-should smile and be happy fo' ya. But instead, I c-can't even take care of my own problems and I get all jealous thinkin' I isn't good enough for ya. And you know what? Maybe I's right, You deserve a better friend Jack Kelly."

Jack was stunned. He knew that Crutchie was real shaken after being in the refuge, but he hadn't realised all that was going on in his head. Jack pulled Crutchie closer to his chest.

"Now I don't want you ever thinkin you isn't good enough."

"But I'm n-not and I want the world f-for you, Jack, since you mean the world to me. You shouldn't have to d-deal with my... my thoughts."

Jack started rocking slightly. "Crutchie, you know I have no problems helping you when you has a bad night. You used to help me through those when I had jus' gotten back- heck, you still do. What's this really about?"

 

Crutchie looked up into Jack's eyes. "I been havin' these real bad thoughts Jack an' I been thinkin maybe they's from the refuge, but they ain't going away."

"What kind of thoughts, kid? You know you can tell me anything and I ain't leavin you. No matter how hard you try, I'll always be right here."

"Jack, I- I been thinkin. I don't really know, but when you is near me, I get all happy an' jittery. When you's close, my face heats up all pink an' i been having these urges. I don't know what's wrong with me!"

Jack's face was surprised for a split second before he burst into laughter. Crutchie's face went completely red and he pursed his lips, "Jaaack!"

Jack wiped his eyes and sighed. "I'm sorry baby boy, I didn't mean to laugh. It sounds tu me like yous went an got yourself a crush on me."

Jack had previously thought Crutchie's face couldn't get any redder, boy was he wrong. He was about as bright as a tomato. His face had also relaxed. "I-"

Jack repositioned Crutchie so he was sitting on his lap facing him instead of sideways. "How's about we try something?"

"L-like w-wh-what?" Crutchie barely was able to get out.

Jack smiled and said "Can I kiss you?"

Crutchie was stunned, but Jack left hand grabbed Crutchie's right, their fingers intertwining. Crutchie then nodded in response to Jack's question, slightly and only once. "Yeah" he whispered.

Jack had noticed how well their hands fit together. He rather liked holding the small boy. His right hand went up to Crutchie's hair and he came down, their lips meeting lightly. Crutchie gasped into the kiss, but then leaned into it. His left hand raised slightly. He put it back down, but then brought it back up to around Jack's shoulder, pulling them closer.

Jack's left hand left Crutchie's, but he moved it to the small of his back, bringing their torsos touching. This caused Crutchie to make a small noise, which caused Jack to smile into it more.

Eventually they had to come apart for air. Crutchie rested his head on Jack's chest, and he proceeded to lie down. Jack's hand was still in Crutchie's hair, so he started petting the soft blond hair. Jack was the first to speak "I dunno about you, but I sure liked that."

Crutchie smiled "Yeah, me too."

"Good." "good."

After more silence, Crutchie spoke again "Jack, can I fall asleep like this?"

"Sure! S'long as I'm comfortable enough."

Crutchie nodded, and within a few minutes, both boys had fallen asleep with smiles on their faces and their problems long forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's part two! See why it was too long to keep as one? (Well, maybe not for some, but I want my chapters around the same length and that length is what is manageable in a day with homework, theatre, robotics, and orchestra coming into play.)
> 
> Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter!
> 
> Word count: 722


	7. Chapter 7

Jack woke up to Cruthie peacefull snuggled against his chests, one of his hands clutching some of his shirt. Jack smiled at the sight. He tried not to move, as to not wake the smaller boy, but Crutchie soon blinked his eyes and yawned.

"Morning Sunshine." Jack mused.

Crutchie chuckled and stretched a little. "Mornin' "

"Sleep well?" Jack ran his fingers through Crutchie's hair, something he found himself liking a lot.

"Best." He smiled and folded his arms under his head, resting it upright. He was still completely on top of Jack, but neither minded at all. 

Right after, the morning bell sounded loudly. "I do believe it's time to sell some papes." Jack smiled wide.

"Ugh, but I don't want to get up!" Crutchie wined. 

"Aww come on, up." 

Crutchie rolled off Jack and onto the ground. He crawled over to his crutch and used it to get up. 

Jack poked his head in the window. "Hey, someone make sure Romeo's up." He said, quieter than usual, and with a smile on his face.

Romeo got up instantly. "Looks like they made up" He laughed. Specs whacked his head with his hat as Romeo walked by his top bunk. "Hey!"

Jack and Crutchie got their clothes situated and Crutchie started to head down the ladder. 

"Hey, no mornin kiss?" Crutchie looked back to see Jack smirking and leaning on one of the rails. 

Cruthcie blushed and giggled. He was not sure what they were, but now he was convinced that these feelings were not bad. He wasn't sure if they were normal, but he was not upset by them anymore. He made his way over to Jack, who in turn, placed his hand on the small of Crutchie's back. Crutchie propped himself up with his crutch and his left tiptoe and their lips met for a quick kiss. 

"Now that's a way to say good morning" Jack chuckled. Crutchie reached up and pulled Jack's hat down playfully and went back over to the latter. Once Jack fixed his hat and grabbed his bag, Crutchie was already half way down. 

"Hey, wait up down there."

While they waited at the gate, everyone was talking like normal, but a few of the boys were looking between Jack and Crutchie, unsure of what happened. The day before, they were like opposing magnets, but it looked like you couldn't pull them apart.

Specs started to gossip with Romeo and Race gave them a glare. "Woah, Race, what's got you in a twist?" Romeo asked.

"I just don't think it's right to use other people's business as a source of amusement." He motioned to the two boys who were currently laughing at some mutual joke.

"Man, sorry Race, I didn't think of it like that." Specs rubbed his neck awkwardly.

"Well, maybe it's time you start." Race walked away, leaving Romeo and Specs dumbfounded.

Just then, the new headline was released. "TOOK FAITH CURE AND DIED.; r.Dowie's Methods Again Under Investigation in Chicago."

There was a collaborative "EYY" As some kids got excited. 

Jack clapped his hands "Not a bad headline boys!"

Kids started buying a few more papers than usual. "I'll take two hundred," Jack said as he slapped a dollar and a nickel down on the box. 

"A hundred fifty for me Mr Weisel." Cruchie followed behind. 

Davey followed suit with his cents "How 'bout a hundred today." He smiled.

 

It was a profitable day and all the boys were going to sleep with full bellies. Jack and Crutchie were sat on the rooftop watching the sunset, Jack's arm around Crutchie's shoulders. Jack hadn't thought about it much before all this, but he really liked holding Crutchie. He was a little worried he was doing it out of sympathy at first, but he knew by now that he actually really liked it. He just wasn't sure if he liked Crutchie himself that way. 

Jack turned to Crutchie and watched his expression with a smile. Crutchie was less of a dreamer of the two, but he was always the one to like the sunsets. This night's was especially pretty. Jack couldn't help but kiss Crutchie's jaw lightly. Crutchie jumped and looked over, blushing.

"Jaaack!" 

"Sorry kid"

Crutchie sighed, smiling. "It's fine, just warn me next time?"

"Okay." 

Crutchie smiled and nodded. He looked back at the sunset, but Jack kept staring at him. After a while, Crutchie giggled and shook his head.

Jack chucked "What?"

Crutchie turned to face him. "You just lookin' at me like that... Jack, yous always the one startin the kiss, so is it okay if I ask you sometimes?" 

"Why sure! I'll take one from you anytime." Jack smirked slightly.

Crutchie leaned forward and their foreheads touched before they moved for the kiss. Crutchie brought his hand up to Jack's hair, and he allowed the smaller boy to lead the kiss instead. Jack moved his arm from Crutchie's shoulders to his lower back, and he arched it a bit at the touch. 

 

"Hey Jack, Crutchie, Do-" Race stopped dead in his tracks. Jack and Crutchie jumped apart. 

Jack looked at Race angrily. "I always tell you guys not to come up here." He said that a little calmer than his face looked.

"I uh I'm sorry, I won't tell the others I promise." Race said quickly and then left just as suddenly as he'd arrived. 

Once he came back inside, Romeo looked up, "Hey is they playin?" They were setting up a game of go fish. 

"Oh, uh... no. Not today."

"Jack and Crutchie denying a go fish game? What are they doin up there?" Specs dealt some cards.

"Yeah, 'Ave they got girls wit them?" Romeo wiggled his eyebrows.

"N-no" Race looked pale as a sheet.

Romeo and Specs looked at each other and then ran towards the window. "NO!" Race shouted and ran in front of it so they wouldn't go out onto the fire escape. "Just watchin' the sunset an don't want to be disturbed or nothin'." He spoke in a definite tone. All the other boys that joined in the commotion shrugged and sat down. 

"I'm winning this time for sure!" Specs said as he sat down with his hand.

"Elmer, got any 7s?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for no update yesterday, I had my big winter orchestra concert.
> 
> Word count: 1041


	8. Chapter 8

Jack was holding Crutchie in his lap, but he was a little tense. "Jack, even if they do find out about us, which they won't, the boys won't care." 

Jack shook his head. "What century are you livin in? I jus don't want tu end up on the streets again. I don't want you out on them streets, you know?"

Crutchie sighed. He wasn't worried, but he knew some of what Jack was saying was probably right. "Come on, we already missed last night's go fish. It's time to go reclaim our titles." 

Jack nodded and they helped each other stand up. Jack handed Crutchie his crutch and they headed inside. The boy's respective signature smiles plastered on their faces.

Race was doing some sort of impression when they walked in. He was standing on the floor but hanging off of his bedpost. Specs was looking down from the top bunk, annoyed. 

Suddenly, Race turned his attention to Jack and Crutchie. "Ev'nin boys! Finally decided we's more excitin' than the sunset?" He walked over towards them dramatically, twirling his cigar in his hand. He seemed way more happy than normal. 

"What's wrong with 'im?" Jack asked.

"What's there to be wrong about? The birds are singin' the sky is blue- well, darkish maroon, courtesy that is's evening, but oh it's evening and that means it's closer to night!" Crutchie gave him a look. Race laughed and put his cigar back into his mouth

"Did anyone give Race alcohol?" Jack asked loudly.

"Naw, This is all natural high, baby!" He threw his hands up into the air. 

"Ooookay? Whos up for a game of go fish?" Jack asked. 

"Yeah!" A few of the newsies came off their bunks and down onto the floor. 

"Race, you leadin'?" Jack looked up. 

"Not tonight, I gotta leave in a minute!" 

"Oh so that's why yous so happy." Crutchie laughed a bit and sent a knowing smile.

"Aw what's that s'pposed to mean?"

"Nothing, go have fun on your walk."

"Aww, he ain't goin' out on a walk. I'd bet he has a girl if not for him seemin such a player. You's the most single guy here." Elmer laughed.

"Well 'scuse me honey, I don't see you with anyone now do I." Race paused a second before his smile returned.

"Aww, Race ain't single." Crutchie chuckled.

"see ya laterrr" He winked and walked out. 

He knew he was acting a little flamboyant, but this time, he got to spend a whole night with Spot. He did a little dance step as he walked down the street. 

They recently decided to trade off meeting in the middle or closer to one of their places, so once he got to the corner near the lodging house in Brooklyn for the first time, he did their whistle and he heard one in response. He ran down the alley he heard it from. 

"Spotty!"

"Hey, Race!" Spot chuckled and fixed his boyfriend's hair

"Have you eaten yet?" Race grabbed Spot's hand, their fingers interlocking.

Spot shook his head, "Not tonight, have you?" 

"Nah. Wanna go get something?"

"Do you have money?" Spot reached for his pocket with his other hand.

"Yeah, I gots money Spot."Race was a little annoyed.

"I know."Spot kissed Race's nose, causing him to crinkle it and smile again.

"I just have to make sure my boyfriend is covered, okay?" 

"Yeah okay", Race giggled.

"I know a place out here that's should still be opened. It's an Italian place, but it ain't expensive or nothin." 

"Sure. Lead the way!" Race motioned for him to lead. 

Spot shook his head and started walking. "You're a dork." 

"Yeah, but you know you looove me!" Race smiled 

"Yeah." Spot chuckled. "I do."

"You know, all the boys 'cept Crutchie think I's single an goin to be forever." Race laughed.

"Not under my watch." Spot kissed Race's neck.

Race made a noise of surprise and then giggled, pushing Spot away. They reached the end of the alley and side streets, so they reluctantly dropped their hands. Eventually, they made it to the restaurant. It was nearly closing, so they were the only ones there.

"Spot!" A waiter came over. "And who's your friend?"

"He's a Manhatten boy. Here for a visit." Spot smiled and sat down at a table.

"Now what's a Manhatten boy like yourself doin all the way out here at this hour?"

"I's here for a visit" 

The waiter still looked confused.

"Ed, howsabout the usual!" Spot said, kicking his feet up onto the table.

Race eyed the menu. Spot said the prices weren't bad, but they sure as hell weren't cheap. He knew he had enough for the cheapest thing on the menu. "I'll take the first sandwich mr. Thanks"

"Your friend here had manners, Spot. You should learn a thing or two from him"

"Oh don't worry sir, I've already taught him plenty." Race said with a smile and then smirked at Spot.

Spot almost spit out his sip of water. He started caughing.

The waiter shook his head. "Well, you should probably teach him more. Maybe tonignt." He pointed at Race.

"Will do, sir." Race smiled wide and chuckled as the waiter walked away.

Spot was blushing and just barely survived that sip of water. He caughed again and weakly said, "Just for those comments, you're not gettin nothin tonight."

"Awww Spottyyyyy"

"No."

"But SpooOOTTTTT."

"NO."

Race slumped in his chair and pouted with a huff.

After they ate, Spot and Race were walking down the street back to the alley to hang out. 

"Spot, how come we can't hold hands now, no one's around. It's a friend thing to do too..." He was still pouting slightly.

"Yeah, about that. I's got somethin to talk to you about..."

"Sean Tommy Conlon if you break up with me I will beat your ass." Race said, a little pissed

Spot laughed, "I could take you down if not that I could never hurt you. No Race, I'm not breaking up with you." He chuckled and shook his head.

"Better not." Race grumbled. 

"Lighten up Race" Spot ruffled his boyfriend's smile, cracking a smile out of him finally.

"There it is!" Spot laughed

"Yeah, alright, now what'cha wanna tell me?" Race put his cigar in his mouth.

"They've opened a new refuge in Brooklyn," Spot said, concerned.

Race instantly took his cigar out of his mouth and right back into his pocket it went. 

"No! They can't do that. We can jus' get it shut down again." Race was in disbelief

Spot shook his head. "You see, but they can. It targets gay kids, so it ain't for no reason'."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Make sure you tell that Jack kid, he's almost as gay as you." Spot laughed.

"What?"

"Come on, don't you know he's got a thing for Crutchie?"

Race's eyes got all wide, "You know about them?" 

Spot laughed again. "Wasn't sure before, but now I am."

"You're an asshole, Spot." Race said as they turned back down into the alley.

"Yup, but I'm your asshole." Spot said, smirking.

"Shut up, Spot." Race said, laughing.

"Hows about you make me," Spot smirked, wrapping his arms around Race's neck.

"Gladly, hon" Race smiled wide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Sorry for not so consistent updates. My midterms are next week. Anything anyone wants to happen, just message me and I'll think about it. Also, criticism is greatly appreciated. I'm partially doing this because I want to become a better writer.
> 
> Word count: 1196


	9. Chapter 9

The next evening, all the boys were playing go fish again. 

Race smiled slyly and put his cigar in his mouth. "Romeooo, got any 8s?"

Romeo angrily handed over three eights.

"Woah! Race, you're merciless!" Jack laughed.

" 's why he can't ever get a girlfriend," Romeo grumbled.

" 'scuse you honey, this is about go fish, not your dreary sex life." Race said, actually partially offended, but not letting on to that.

"Race, got any 2s?" Romeo asked, over it by now.

"Go fish." Race laughed.

Crutchie smiled, "Romeo, give those 2s!" Romeo groaned again and handed over two 2s.

Crutchie slapped down four twos. "Woah, and the Crutch-master's on a roll!" Jack said, ruffling the smaller boy's hair. 

Crutchie chuckled, "I'm gonna head to bed, yous can play another round if you want."

"Nah, I'm pretty beat." Elmer said. A few other boys added in their two cents and everyone headed to their beds. 

Right as Crutchie was almost out the window, Race walked over to them. "Hey, I has something to tell you guys."

"Alright, come out with us." Jack said and motioned to the window.

Race instantly started laughing and almost fell on the floor. Crutchie and Jack looked confused, but then Crutchie got it and almost fell out the window. Jack had to catch him. 

"What?" Jack asked, still confused. Crutchie and Race waved him off, and their laughter died down.

Eventually, they all made it out onto the fire escape, Crutchie sitting on the ground, Jack leaning against the rail, and Race sitting on one of the rails, though secure enough as to not fall off.

"Alright, in all seriousness, what's up?" Crutchie asked.

"There's a new lodging house in Brooklyn area. It targets gay kids specifically, so there isn't a real good way to shut it down."

"Dammit." Jack ran his fingers through his hair and kicked one of the rails. Crutchie looked up at Jack with a frown. 

"Where'd you hear this?" Crutchie asked. 

"Spot told me. I went to Brooklyn last night." Race said, nodding.

"Hang on, whats you doin' in Brooklyn meetin Sp- Ohh" Jack realised with wide eyes.

"You an' Spot?" Jack asked, his hand out for emphasis.

Race nodded. 

"Spot, I shouldda guessed!" Crutchie flopped back. 

"Hang on you knew?" Jack turned to Crutchie.

"Only that he was meetin someone, probably a boy too." Crutchie sat up.

"An' you didn't tell me?" Jack frowned

Crutchie shrugged.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Alright, thanks, Racer. I'll be on the lookout about that. Unless they spread here, no use worryin' the fellas." He motioned back into the room where many of the boys were crawling into their beds.

"See ya Jack, Crutchie. Sleep well." Race left out the window back to his bed.

Jack still looked worried. "Come on, Jack. Let's just go to bed. No real reason to worry 'less they make their way out here." 

Jack nodded. "Yeah, alright." 

Jack lied down and put out his arm for Crutchie to lie next to him. Jack wrapped his arm around his shoulders. Jack kissed the smaller blonde's forehead. "Night."

"Night." came a muted reply, half yawning. Jack chuckled and closed his eyes, letting sleep take him in.

 

Jack heard a big door open and froze, scared out of his wits. 

"Jaaack." A voice sang.

The poor twelve year old looked up with wide eyes. "w-what?" 

A dull pain erupted in his face. "Don't you dare speak to me unless I ask you to!"

He hissed in pain. The next thing he knew, he was on the floor again and getting his chest and stomach pounded in. He felt another blow to his upper chest when suddenly the kicks stopped. He sighed in relief, but all too soon, someone was picking him up by his shirt collar. They spat in his face and then punched his head roughly, dropping him back onto the floor. His head hit the pole which he was sometimes tied too, causing him to blackout. When he came to, he was in much more pain and a foot was crushing on his ankle. He hissed loudly in pain. 

"Stop..."

"What was that? Did you say something?" The foot came off his ankle but replaced itself on the side of his face. 

"ANSWER ME, BOY!" The booming voice echoed throughout the room. 

"n-no," He said quietly. 

"Good." He picked his foot back up and kicked him in the stomach one more time- hard. 

Jack coughed and sputtered in pain. He felt something drip out of his mouth- probably blood, but he didn't care. He heard the door close and instantly, he either blacked out or fell asleep from pure exhaustion. Which one, he couldn't tell.

 

Jack woke with a start. He closed his eyes and breathed in quickly and out very slowly and heavily many times. A tear dripped down the side of his face.

"Jack? Jack what's wrong?" Crutchie was on his knees next to him. 

Jack opened his eyes and sat up. He looked at Crutchie with a look of pain. It had been ages, but Crutchie had always been the one to comfort Jack after one of his nightmares, so he knew what it looked like. 

"Shh, it'll be alright," Crutchie whispered.

He held Jack as he sobbed. "It's all gonna be fine. You'll see." 

He kissed Jacks head and hugged him again, thinking about how it was not very long ago that their roles here were reversed. It could just have easily been him sobbing from the dark memories that manifested themselves in those night terrors. A tear slipped down his cheek as they held each other.

Eventually, both boys were shaking in each other's arms. It was no longer about the dream anymore. It was about everything. The pain. Their own pain, but also the pain that they knew the other must feel. The pain that it was not getting better. 

The pain that other kids are experiencing at that very moment in the Brooklyn refuge.

Jack cried for his lungs which were never quite right again, due to his inability to get medical attention after all his beatings.

Crutchie cried for how his skin would burn if someone touched him and caught him off guard. 

Jack cried for the pained look that ghosted behind Crutchie's smile every day.

Crutchie cried for the low self-esteem that was implanted in Jack him after being told day in and day out that he was worthless. 

They both held each other and cried it all out. But it never could leave them. It would never be out no matter how much they cried. 

No matter what they did, it was never enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, sorry that one went kind of dark, I was having a moment when I reminisced on me this time last year, so I turned on My Chemical Romance "Sleep" and then this happened... 
> 
> Anyways. I'll try to keep the updates, but I have midterms Monday and Tuesday. After that, I'm on break and I might (no promises) update twice a day sometimes. Yup Yup good stuff.
> 
> ***Thanks so much for all the reads btw! I have 300 on AO3 and 80 on Wattpad. I know that's not a whole ton compared to the big shot writers, but that's a lot for me considering I just started this fanfic at the end of last month. Thanks all!***
> 
> Word count: 1111


	10. Chapter 10

Almost all the boys were hanging out at Jakobie's. Some were sipping a glass of water, while others were eating food they'd ordered. Jack was sitting on the table with his feet on a chair and Cruthie was sitting in the chair next to the one Jack was occupying. 

Jack looked around and noticed everyone but him and Crutchie in conversations. He leaned over to him and said quietly, "Hey, howsabout we break outta here an' head back early."

Crutchie looked up at him, smiling. "Yeah, okay."

Jack smiled and patted Crutchie's shoulder. "Hey, Crutch n' I's gonna head back early today, K? See yous later. Don't stay out too late, alright?" He smiled, jokingly. 

"Yes mudda" Race, who was up on the table next to Jack leaned back, rather than turning around, and smiled. 

Jack chuckled and they headed out, a few of the other newsies mumbling their goodbyes. As soon as they left, Jack looked around to make sure no one was watching them, and he grabbed Crutchie's free hand, ducking down into the alley next to the restaurant. 

"Jack? What's ya doin?" Crutchie sped up to match his pace.

"You jus lookin way too cute in there. That otta be a crime." He smiled weakly, almost smirking and Crutchie blushed bright, surprised. He felt his breath start to hitch. Jack's heart started beating, his head spinning with questions. He was not quite sure still why he was attracted to Crutchie or if he was attracted to boys or just Crutchie. All he knew was that there was a really cute boy in front of him with slightly messed up hair and breathing laboured from moving fast who also had blush dusted across his nose and cheeks. And he wanted him.

Jack pushed Crutchie over to the wall and kissed him, surprisingly gentle. Crutchie just about melted, letting Jack and the wall hold him up. He brought his arms up to Jack's hair.

Jack felt Crutchie start to slide down a little, so he moved his hands from the smaller boy's shoulders to his hips. He licked Crutchie's bottom lip, eliciting a small squeak from the blonde boy. Jack used this opportunity to enter into the others mouth, their tongues melding into one. 

At this, Crutchie pushed his hips forward a bit, tentatively. Jack responded with a moan and grinded up against the smaller boy who was now a complete blushing mess. Crutchie hummed a little into the kiss and everything was golden for a few moments. Jack suddenly felt some pressure in his pants, causing his eyes to shoot open.

Jack suddenly broke the kiss. "I'm sorry I-" 

He held Crutchie up still, for he knew by now that he gets incredibly weak when getting intimate. Had he let go, Crutchie would most definitely have fallen. 

"What?" Crutchie asked with wide eyes. "Did I do something?" 

"No," His voice cracked. "I mean, uhh." He took one hand and ran his fingers through his hair. He had never had that happen with another guy before. He hadn't really thought about it much. He was undoubtedly attracted to Crutchie, but Crutchie was a boy. 

"Hey, don't worry. I won push ya to do nothin you don't wanna." Crutchie smiled at him but was a little confused. Jack was the one initiating most of the contact. If he was confused then what even were they. Were they a closeted item, or were they merely a friends with benefits scenario. Though he was not really sure what could constitute as benefits, for this was the furthest they'd gone. 

Crutchie regained his footing and grabbed his crutch which had lied, forgotten on the ground. 

"Hey, I'm sorry baby. Let's go home, yeah?" Jack asked Crutchie, holding his hand out. 

Crutchie smiled a real smile this time and grabbed Jack's hand before they both headed towards the lodging house. 

They had been on their way for a little while when they ran into a girl in a recognisable pink dress. 

"Jack!" She raced over to them.

"Kath! What're you doin here?"Jack let go of Crutchie's hand to hug her. 

"I was on my way to find you. We should really catch up again!"

"Yeah." Jack smiled and nodded.

"What do you say we all go to my house for some tea? Crutchie, you too!" She laughed.

"Sure, whaddu yu say Crutch?" Jack tapped Crutchie's arm with the back of his hand. 

"Sure!" He smiled wide. He liked Katherine a lot. She was part of the reason they won the strike. He just didn't like how she had the power to steal Jack from him and that she sometimes treated him like he was younger, just because of his disability. Well, honestly most everyone but Jack did that, so he couldn't really blame her.

As they all walked to Katherine's house, Jack and Kath were talking, while Crutchie walked behind them. He realised happily that he felt like his old self again. He smiled naturally and he felt laid back. He was mildly irked that his plans got messed up, but he was always down for an adventure, especially if it was with Jack.

Once they got into Kath's house, Crutchie almost didn't even want to step inside. He felt like he'd mess up the clean, fancy interior. Jack acted similar, but not to as much a degree as Crutchie. He had been there a few times, so he didn't feel as awkward about it. 

"Have you boys eaten?" She asked quickly after they took off their shoes. 

"Oh, I'm fine miss," Crutchie said quickly.

"That doesn't answer my question. Jack?"

"Truthfully, not yet."

"Well, let's get some food in you! Follow me." Katherine led them into the kitchen. They all ate a meal and they did have a lovely time catching up. Crutchie did feel awkwardly like a third wheel though, which kind of annoyed him, especially after what just happened. 

When around everyone else, Jack paid extra attention to Crutchie, but when around Katherine, she seemed to replace that role he was used to having. He kept his good spirits up though. He couldn't upset Jack. He still felt terrible for breaking down when Jack visited Kath last time. He didn't want to become that overprotective jealous friend. He just noticed when they got a little more touchy-feely than normal friends, which made his smile falter a little.

When they left, Crutchie said bye with a smile, but when the other two hugged goodbye, his eyes were no longer sparkling quite as bright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrightyyy I'm back from my break! Sorry if this chapter isn't very good. I kinda had to force myself to get back into it.
> 
> Okay, so I named the title The Crutch That Aint Under My Arm because the whole book is partially about relationship dependencies and you know like a baby blanket is an example of a crutch? Idk, is it too much to think about in a title, like is it misleading? Lmk if you think I should change it. I'm open to suggestions as well. :)
> 
> Word count: 1085


	11. Chapter 11

Jack and Crutchie were up on the rooftop again, just looking at the stars in silence. It was peaceful and lovely. Both boys seemed afraid to break the silence. Eventually, Jack caved.

"Alright, I'm gonna hit the sack. Howsabout a goodnight kiss for your ol' Jackey?" He smiled at Crutchie.

"Not tonight Jack." Crutchie didn't even move to look at him.

"Oh, okay." Jack was caught off guard but retreated to his usual sleeping spot.

"Night Crutchie." He said before closing his eyes.

"Night Jack." Crutchie still hadn't moved from his stargazing spot. He fell asleep some time into the night, but not before the sky showed the dim signs of mornings approach.

The rest of the next day, the other Newsies could tell something was up between Jack and Crutchie, but they learned not to question it.

 

You would think it would get old after a while, but still time after time, Race found himself smiling like an idiot as he made the trek to the corner of 11th Street and 49th Avenue. He was sure that the giddiness of young love would never wear out. Spot was his everything and he knew he would not let that go away. He would never let Spot get taken away from him.

With those thoughts in mind, he put a little skip in his step. He arrived relatively soon, not even feeling tired after his hour walk.

He whistle called out and didn't hear a response. He walked around a little, calling every 30 seconds or so. Eventually, he heard a response from a dark, thin alley. He knew it was Spot's call, but it still made him uneasy to go down it. He took a deep breath and put on his brave face. At the very least, Spot would protect him. He could defend himself, sure, but he knew he had the strongest band of newsies behind him, and above all, he had Spot, the most feared and respected Newsie completely on his side.

Cautiously, he shuffled down the alley, smiling in relief once it widened a little. He called out again and then walked forward some more.

Soon, he felt some strong arms wrap around his waist. He lifted his arms in reaction, relaxing right after.

"Hey." He smiled

"Hey yourself." Spot rested his head on Race's shoulder.

"Why the new place?" Race took his cigar it if his pocket and twiddled it in his fingers before placing it in his mouth.

Spot let go lightly and turned around Race so he'd be facing his boyfriend. "Harder tu find. Further from the street. Just tu be on the safe side fo' now."

"Alrighty." Race chuckled.

"Do what's a pretty boy like yourself been up tu?" Spot stepped back and leaned against the wall, arms crossed.

"Oh you know. Selling papes. Winnin moneyyy." He pulled out a handful of coins from his pocket and shook them around before putting them back where they came from.

Spot chucked. "Hey, what ever happened to that Jack fella. He get together with his boy toy yet?"

"Eh. They's on an off. One moment they's kissin, the next, Crutchie's not speakin to him." He shrugged and then leaned in almost whispering. "I thinks he's still with that Katherine gurl."

Spot rolled his eyes. "They needs tu figure their lives out."

Race took his cigar from his mouth, "least we've got ours figured."

Race started walking towards Spot, pocketing his cigar before pinning him against the wall, kissing him gently at first, but then rougher and needier.

Race leaned in closer and ground up against Spot, deepening the kiss. Spot groaned, but then broke the kiss, whispering in between breaths and Races kissed

"N-not... to-today Racey... we can't."

He put his hand up on Race's chest and pushed him away lightly.

Race frowned, but took a step back.

"Listen," Spot cooed, "Baby, we needs to be quiet today, alright?"

"Yeah, how's about we just talk t'day?" Race sat down on the ground, and put his cigar into his mouth, playing with it a little.

Spot raised an eyebrow, but joined Race on the ground, rocking a little, awkwardly. He put his hands on his knees. "So..."

"Hey I's for a question fo' ya." Spot took his cigar into his hands.

"Shoot."

"You always ask what I'd been doin, but what've you done this week?"

Spot nodded. "Uh. You know. Selling papes." He fidgeted.

"THE Spot Conlon just sellin papes." Race smirked and gave him a look.

"Yeah, alright. Tommy an' Mick both got taken to the refuge. I'd just a little scared is all."

Race frowned. "Hey. It'll be alright." He took Spot's hand.

"Man, I never understood how people feared you. You care so much about your newsies." Race shook his head.

He started again, "listen, well get Tommy and Mick back. I'll talk to Jack an see what we can do. I'll tell you what, Maybe we could get all them newsies together. Do somethin bout it."

Spot frowned and shook his head, "Brooklyn newsies is all homophobic. They's never gonna stand for us helping."

"Spot, yous the head of them Brooklyn newsies." Race touched Spot's shoulder. "You can influence them. They care fo you as much as you them."

"Aw, I dunno about that." Spot said that in a way that was definite. Race sighed but didn't say anything about that.

"Hey, I love you, alright?" Race looked into Spot's eyes.

Spot smiled and kissed Race. "Yeah I knows. I love you too."

Spot reached up and brushed Race's hair out of his face.

"What'd I ever do tu deserve someone so perfect as you?" Spot smiled bright.

"Me? Look at you!" Race exclaimed surprised. "Yous caring and generous. Yous got muscle" Race touched Spots arm "woof" he whispered.

"An your face! What a view! I could just kiss that all day!" He took Spot's face in his hands and kissed his nose.

Spot giggled a little, putting his hands over Race's.

"We's gonna run away together some time Race. I's never gonna let you go." He kissed Race's forehead.

The two boys held each other and Race accidentally fell asleep, but they both felt more safe and happy than either could remember. Spot had decided that he'd invite Race to stay the night in his room at Brooklyn some time. His boys knew not to mess with Race, so he figured it wouldn't be too jarring to their order.

With these blissful thoughts of their future together, Spot fell asleep too. He had planned to wake Race up, but never got the chance. They ended up sleeping through the morning and into the afternoon.

They were both woken up by shouting and a man in a uniform running at them. Spot jumped up, picking up Race with him. They looked at each other and instantly took hands to start running.

They made a quick left at the end of the alley. They were going to keep on that street that they turned onto, but another man blocked that path and reached for them. They quickly turned left again and ran fast. Race tripped, but Spot helped him catch his footing.

Another man started running at them from the opposite direction they were running. Spot led them down a side street to the right.

A man reached out from another intersection and grabbed Race.

Spot's eyes widened and he shouted "NO!" and reached for Race. The shout could've made anyone believe he was being killed or something of the like, but going to that refuge may have well meant death.

"RACE!" He kicked the larger man's shin. Spot jumped on him and literally attacked with all his might, punching and biting. "RACE! RACEY! ANTHONY! TONY, MY BABY!"

Spot punched the man in the head hard, completely knocking him out. Race dropped, but Spot caught him so he didn't fall, getting him on his feet.

"YOU GO FIRST!" Spot pushed him forward lightly, and Race took off running, Spot following after him.

Suddenly, Spot was grabbed off his feet from behind. He let out an oof, but instantly started kicking and flailing, trying to break free. Race whipped around, tears in his eyes, "SPOT!" He reached for him. Another man came out from behind Spot and reached for Race.

In all of Spot's kicking and flailing, he kicked the man, making him fall back.

"RUUUN!" Spot shouted at Race.

"I LOVE YOU SEAN, I'LL GET YOU OUT! I PROMISE." Race shouted as he turned around and ran. He knew that Spot sacrificed himself for him, so he was not letting that go to waste.

He ran as fast as he could until he couldn't run anymore, and then some. He reached Manhattan in record time. He noticed how late they managed to sleep in once he saw all the newsies playing cards after a hard days work.

He rushed in, still in tears and threw up right on the floor, his body racking with sobs.

Jack got up and rushed over to him "Race! Race can you hear me?"

Race nodded and dry heaved.

"What happened? Race, talk to me." He started rubbing the poor boys back.

He managed to get out the only word that had been on his mind, the only word that mattered, before passing out.

"Spot."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all, sorry that this was so late! It was a really hard chapter to write! Crutchie and Spot are my two most favourite characters, so I didn't want to hurt the poor souls. I guess it was inevitable...
> 
> Please comment what you think! I'm open to criticism too; I would just appreciate some feedback.
> 
> Word count: 1487


	12. Chapter 12

As soon as Race fell into Jack's arms, everyone crowded around them. 

"Hey! Give some space, come on clear out!" Jack shouted over all the noise of people talking and gossiping about the scene playing out before them. 

"Specs, help me bring him to a bed." Jack nodded over at him.

They moved Race over to a bed, which happened to be Crutchie's, but he didn't mind. Race's was towards the complete other side of the room.

Right after he was set down, Race started blinking heavily. He moved to sit up, but Jack gently pushed him back down on the pillow. "Hey, you should rest!"

Race pushed himself up. "no... NO I'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING!" 

He jumped off the bed and up on his feet. He brought his hands up to his hair in stress, messing it up more than it already was- if that was even possible.

Race paced, facing away from everyone and mumbled to himself "do something... do something... jack..." 

Everyone stayed away from him, almost in fear. Race's eyes were wide and bloodshot from crying. 

Crutchie cautiously walked over to Race. "I'm sure it'll be okay." He put his hand on Race's shoulder, "Why don't you calm dow-"

"dON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!" Race pushed Crutchie back, accidentally knocking him over, his crutch falling to the ground with a clang. Jack instantly shot up and helped Crutchie to his feet. 

Race screamed loud and fell to his knees. He started sobbing again, completely enraged "SEAN, SEANY!" He cried into his hands like a little kid. "my baby" he said in a pitiful, teary voice. 

"Who's Sean?" Albert asked Jack.

"Uhh." Jack and Crutchie shared a look. 

"Yeah, I ain't heard of no-one named Sean." Specks shook his head.

Race turned around and looked at Specks, "That's because you don't care."

"NONE OF YOU EVEN CARED ABOUT HIM!" He motioned to the group of newsies huddled together in the middle of the room.

"If any of you looked past what you saw, you'd know." Race wiped his nose.

"An then wit' support, he'd be able to know he could tell his newsies tu knock it off an' then he'd show them that it's okay an' then they'd shut down that stupid refuge together an'..." He said all this really quickly, so most didn't catch any of it.

He whispered to his self, "an' then my spotty would be back." 

Race turned to Jack, shaking his head in desperation, "Jack, we's gotta do something. We's gottta." 

He looked so pitiful with his messed up clothes and hair and bloodshot, pained eyes, that Jack almost started crying too. "W-what even happened." Jack swallowed a lump.

Race backed up and looked at everyone. "They's got Spot. In that new refuge, they's got him." 

"Yeah, but what do you care?" Romeo asked, causing Jack to shoot him a death glare.

Race's face flared up with anger, and he whipped around to stare at Romeo, walking towards him. "Did you ever pull your head out of your ASS for ONE MINUTE tu think that maybe, I'm not single?" His voice cracked at the end of the sentence.

Race pushed through the other newsies to his bed, lied down facing the wall, and started crying, just out of pure sadness like a baby crying for it's mother.

All the other newsies cleared out to their own bunks, but they still watching the scene. Jack walked over to Race, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Race. We'll get him out, I promise." Jack sniffled and wiped a tear. "Jus' not tonight." He paused again. "We has to come up with a plan, alright?" 

Race nodded after a few seconds, so Jack patted the boy's shoulder before retreating. He shot all the other newsies a glare, causing them to look away and go back to talking or starting to go to sleep.

Jack motioned for Crutchie to come out and join him, so he obliged, following out the window after him.

They both sat out on the rooftop in silence for a while. Jack was sitting with his knees up, and his hands in his hair propping his head up. He always felt like all of the newsies' problems fell onto him to solve, and he was fine with that, but it wore him out after a while.

Crutchie eventually spoke, "Jack..."

Jack's head raised and he looked over at Crutchie, tears streaming down his face. Crutchie scooted over and hugged Jack tight. They stayed like that again for a while, Jack crying as Crutchie held him. 

It didn't matter how annoyed Crutchie was at Jack about their situation. What mattered most was that Jack was okay. Above all, they were friends, best friends, and that overtook everything. The most important thing to Crutchie was Jack, and he could tell that in that moment with intense clarity.

As Crutchie held him, Jack realised, having similar thoughts, that he didn't have any idea what he'd do without Crutchie. 

"I can't help but think..." Jack wiped his nose. "What if it was you they took. It could have just as easilyhave been."

Jack looked over at Crutchie who was staring at him, in all of his perfection with a caring look, his face lit just so by the moon. 

In that moment, everything that Jack was confused about didn't matter anymore. It all made sense suddenly, or perhaps it just all went away. 

"I..." Jack hugged Crutchie, his hand bringing the smaller boy's head to his chest. "I won't let you go. I love you too much." 

"You... love me?" Crutchie's eyes widened.

"Yeah. I do." Jack separated the hug and looked into Crutchie's eyes. "I'm sure of it, now more than ever."

"I thoughts you was just doin' it for sympathy." Crutchie said quietly.

"No... No, I was jus' confused..." He put his hands out in front of him, motioning for emphasis, looking away. "I.. I never thoughts I could end up with a boy, but you..." 

He looked back at Crutchie, shaking his head. "You's different. You's special."

"I love you." Jack pleaded for Crutchie to believe him, his voice cracking.

"Really?" Crutchie asked, still a little shocked.

"Yeah. An' I can say that now an' know fo sure." Jack shook his head. "I never felt like this with no one else before."

Crutchie felt his heart start beating and his breath stop. This was like a dream come true. He never thought he'd be hearing this.

Jack took the smaller boy's hands. "Charlie, will you be my boyfriend?"

Crutchie's mouth hung open. He nodded at first, then quietly said, "Yes."

Jack smiled wide and kissed Crutchie like he was the most precious thing there ever was. They were able to forget about why they'd been crying earlier and the pressure put on Jack.

It was time for Jack to finally be happy, and it was time for Crutchie to fully recover from his stay in the refuge. 

Although, maybe Jack hadn't fully healed yet either. Perhaps one could say, it was time for them to heal each other.

Either way, it marked a significant moment in both of the boys' lives. Unbenonced to them, it was the next step in the domino effect that would be the exact reason for writing this. Was it was for better or for worse? Well, that's for fate decide and for you to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know this chapter is a bit jumpy in the mood, but that's on purpose. The next chapters might come across as cliche or as unrealistic, but bear with me, you will find out why by the end.
> 
> Word count: 1208


	13. Chapter 13

The next morning, they still had to go out to sell their papers. Crutchie had woken up early, so he came into the main room to see what the other boys were doing and to grab his vest which he had left on his bed. 

He smiled at the sight before him. Race had almost all of the newsies huddled around him. They were all making up plans. Crutchie noticed he was actually a pretty good leader. The other newsies looked eager to help and they were soaking up every word he said. 

He watched from the wall a little bit more. Soon, Elmer noticed Crutchie and called him over. Race looked over at him, "Eyy, Crutchie! Come heah, we's on tu someting!"

They all talked through plans for the next ten-ish minutes until the morning bell rang.

Crutchie pulled Race aside for a second. "Hey, Race? I's thinking that you've got this pretty unda control, yeah?" 

"Yeah?" Race adjusted his hat.

"Jack really needs a break, so I's thinking maybe we tell him that him and I's going to Katherine's tu make up a plan, but really it's tu get him tu take a break?" Crutchie fidgeted with his crutch handle.

"Alright, yeah." Race lightly hit Crutchie's shoulder. "Yeah, the ol' man needs a break."

Crutchie nodded and smiled. 

Jack stepped into the room, fixing his suspenders. His hair was a mess, and he looked like he hadn't slept. He started to call for everybody to get up, but stopped short when everyone was already dressed and some had already gone to the gate. 

Jack froze and blinked a few times. He then shrugged and turned around to go in the direction of the gate. 

"Oh, uh, hey Jack?" Crutchie reached his left hand in Jack's direction slightly, causing the taller boy to spin around.

"Yeah?" 

"I uh" Crutchie looked down and started fidgeting. "I thinks we should go to Katherine's for a few days. Maybe come up with a plan... Maybe rest a bit?"

Jack thought this over for a minute. "Alright. But-" He pointed his finger out, "only tuh make a plan." He smiled at Crutchie, who sighed in relief, surprised his plan actually worked. 

Jack turned around, and Crutchie followed. When they reached the gate, Jack stood up on a stack of papes. "HEY!" He called to get everybody's attention.

"Crutchie and I's goin to Katherine's for a day or two-" Crutchie piped up "or three" causing Jack to raise his eyebrows playfully.

"We's goin to Kath's tu make a plan, alright?" 

A few of the newsies looked confused, and Romeo almost spoke up, but Crutchie's death glare made everyone just smile and nod.

"Alright" "good luck" "bye" different newsies said their two cents and Jack nodded before turning to Crutchie, "Shall we go?" 

Crutchie giggled, "Yup!"

They headed off to Katherine's house together. Crutchie was still worried that Katherine wouldn't want them to stay at her house for a few days unannounced, but he had a feeling she'd be fine with it.

Once they finally arrived, Jack took Crutchie's hand and knocked at the door. Katheine answered, ink smudged on her fingers, and a pencil sat resting on her ear.

"Jack!" She happily corraled him inside and hugged him, taking his hands.

"What brings you guys here?" She looked over at Crutchie and back at Jack again.

"They opened up a new sorta refuge in Brooklyn yeah?"

Katherine nodded; She'd heard about that already last time Jack and Crutchie came over.

"Well," Jack continued, "They's got Spot an' it's becomin' a real issue."

"Oh my! Here, sit down in there and I'll be in in a minute with some tea." She disappeared down a hallway. Crutchie followed after her. 

Once they both arrived in the kitchen, Crutchie started to speak, "So uh Katherine, Jack really jus' needs a break, so I's thought we could maybe pretend tu make a plan or somthin'. Really, just have him rest you know? Race already has a plan goin with the otha fellas."

"Yeah, okay." She nodded.

"I hope we's not interruptin anything." Crutchie looked to the side.

"No, not at all, don't worry!" She laughed a little."

"Alright." Crutchie grinned wide.

"Hey, let me help you wit that." He motioned to the trays Katherine was trying to balance. 

"Oh, I've got it." 

"No, I insist!" Katherine looked up to see Crutchie smiling genuinely. She sighed a little and handed him a tray. He held open the swing door too to let her come through. 

They arrived back in the first room. Crutchie set down the tray of biscuits he was holding and Katherine set down a tray with three cups of tea and another with sugar, milk, and honey.

Crutchie sat down next to Jack on the couch, while Katherine took the chair that was adjacent to it. Jack ended up between the two.

Jack added some fixings to his tea and motioned it at Katherine "Thanks, Kath." He smiled.

She put her hand on his shoulder, oh it's no problem at all, anything for you, Jack. 

Crutchie's eyebrows knit together slightly as he shifted uncomfortably, looking to his side. He kind of expected this, but as long as Jack is relaxing...

What he hadn't noticed was for Jack to notice his slight decline in mood. Jack turned to Crutchie, giving him a peck on the cheek, "I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean to ignore you." 

He looked up to meet a pair of warm brown loving eyes looking down at him. He blushed lightly.

"Here, what do you want in your tea?" Jack asked, still leaning closer to Crutchie.

"Uhh, I don't know. I ain't never have tea." That was true. Even though he'd been to Katherine's house before, no one ever paid attention to him enough for him to ask how to do it, and he didn't want to draw attention to himself.

"Never had tea!" Jack looked at Katheine wide-eyed and back at Cruthie, "ohh hu hu. We's gotta change that!"

"Here, try a sip first." He handed Crutchie's previously forgotten cup to him.

He tentatively took a sip of the steaming liquid. Jack smiled, "Do you want it sweeter, thicker, or creamier or a mix of those."

Crutchie made a slight face at the unexpectedly bitter drink. "Sweeter." He said quickly, causing both Jack and Katherine to laugh slightly. 

Jack took the cup and added two lumps of sugar for the poor boy who was still recovering. He also added a small drizzle of honey to it before handing it back. "How's that?"

Crutchie wearily took a sip. He instantly closed his eyes and melted into a smile. "Really good." He opened them again to see an amused Jack and a laughing Katherine. 

During their tea time, every so often, to make Crutchie not feel left out, Jack would place his hand on Crutchie's knee, or kiss his cheek, or play with his hair a little.

By the time they'd finished their tea, Crutchie was lying down, his head rested on Jack's lap, while the latter played with the small blonde's hair. Jack looked down at Crutchie, their eyes meeting with loving looks. Jack smiled. He then smirked and blew lightly on Crutchie's face. He giggled and closed his eyes, scrunching up his nose. 

"Jaaack." He whined. 

"Sorry baby, you were too cute." Jack leaned down and kissed his nose, causing him to open his eyes and giggle. He sighed in defeat, snuggling into Jack. 

Jack grabbed his sketchpad out of his newsies bag which was next to his feet, tore out a page and started to draw Crutchie, as he'd done many times before. This time felt different though. He added details to his face that could only be seen up close. After finishing, Jack held the sketch out to get a better look at it. Jack added over-top in sweeping letters the words

Love Wins

 

Since he was in a comfortable position, it wasn't long until Jack joined Crutchie in a drowsy dreamland, his sketchbook and the paper next to him, forgotten on the couch. Katherine walked over and smiled at the pair. The open sketch caught her eye as well. She picked it up and looked at Jack, putting it in her pocket. Ideas glistened in her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, talk about haitus amirite? Ha sorry. I really failed you guys huh. Well, I'm hoping since I have such amazing readers that I haven't lost all of you and that you can forgive me for leaving for ehrm... 3 months... I know! Ah well. Have some Jack/Crutchie fluff to fill your hearts with joy.
> 
> As always, I have a storyline planned, but any suggestions, comments, concerns, let me know! I'm completely open to ideas. :)
> 
> word count: 1385


End file.
